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I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a aunt, a friend, a godmother, and best of all....A child of God!!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Always say " I love you"


After today I will try with all my might to get back to " Just Annette" and blog whats going on in this home of mine, I'm sure there will be from time to time things about my brother, but his leaving has had a big impact on me, more than I tell.
The celebration my niece, my nephew and my Mom gave him was just beautiful, I got to play a Beatles song for him, I played the "The Long and Winding Road" the minister spoke of how my brother gave his heart and life back to Lord a few weeks back, my cousin spoke,who owns the farm, spoke how he went to the field and my brother drove the picker to the side of land and there belting out on the radio was a Christan song, and Joey was trying to sing the words to it, now my brother couldn't carry a tune for anything, but you know to God it was the most prettiest voice!! My brother told our cousin that he couldn't wait for cotton picking to slow down so he could attend church more, he couldn't get enough of the word or the love God gives.I have no doubt what so ever that my brother isn't walking the streets of gold right this very second and saying "I'm glad I'm not in the world anymore farther" there was small blond headed little girl, just crying, she was from my brother's step mother side of the family, and she was just crying, I held her on my lap told her who I was and asked her if she'd like to see "Joey" she shook her head yes as she sniffled in her tears, I picked her up, carry her to my brothers body and she cried more, I hugged her and said "Sweetie, its ok to miss my brother, but he's with the angles now, be happy" she looked at me and smiled and the spirit of laughter came over her, I loved it, the holy spirit was in that small little southern baptist church!! There was drama on his step mothers part, and I held our mothers hand and arm back, nothing towards our mother, but there is always someone who has to try and show their butt in a crowd, and for this last week I have not been so talkative, imagine that, me shutting up! I didn't want to leave the cemetery yesterday, to final for me, I sat there for a long time, and mom came up and said " Sis, say good bye" I hollered back, " I will Momma, just leave me alone for a bit" as I continued to sit, Momma was behind me now, with her hand on my shoulder, " Come on Sis, say good bye to his shell, that's all that's there honey" "MOM" I yelled back "LEAVE ME ALONE......PLEASE" and she did, then later on I apologized, she hugged me, a moms hug feels so good. The Pastor that gave the service and prayed for my brother when my brother said that sinners prayer said this, " If you have people in your life that you love, and we all do, tell them everyday "I love you" pick up that phone if you have too, write them on the computer and tell them, but don't ever let a day go by without telling them that" I will have to post on something, later, that happened since my brothers passing, its our mom and my brothers ex-wife, its beautiful...later on.
So I know will be ending this post and so many with " I LOVE YOU"

3 comments:

Donetta said...

Annette thank you for processing your day here. Opening up and letting it out of the silence of your mind. What a gift you and the child were given to each other.
Be embraced and that phone is right here if you would like an ear on the other side. I am here.
Loving you

kimberly said...

sounds like it was a beautiful celebration, annette....and that your family found peace on this day....and i can't wait to hear the word on your mom and brother's ex-wife.....? wonderful!....sometimes we just have to process grief and finality in our own aloneness, don't we?....to feel okay with how things are in our heart.
thought of you so often yesterday...thank you for sharing your day with us.
know you are loved,
kimberly

Denise said...

Oh I loved reading this post and the memories of your brothers home going.. How very very precious that the Father God wooed your brother back in the last few days of his life.. How much love the Father has for HIS kids that not a one be lost.. What a special thing for you to know about the music in the field... That one day will make you smile....... Oh the joys that await us....... We will see Jesus and those that we love.....

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